More reader comments/questions (4)
Q. I was reading the Q & A and someone said something about a Fox Pilot for YiR. Was there really a pilot, and if so, is there somewhere I could download it? (Jack, Seattle)
A. Yes, there really was a Fox pilot of YiR. I know because I was there for the taping. Alas, I don't know how you can get a copy of it. The producers were Brillstein-Grey, if that helps.
Q. I just read the comments by the guy who was dumped and almost went to jail on christmas...and you said that one should not follow Nick's example to far. But I think that is not true. Nick, besides having some minor setbacks along the way, is at this moment living the golden life. I would give my left-nut to trade places with him. I know that is a common expression, but I really mean it. My left nut! Besides, his life is fun and exciting. Plus he gets sex all the time...ah, the best life has yet to be seen by all of us. Nick is the man. (Twisp is the Man, Eaton, CT)
A. Me thinks thou art too hasty to part with thy left nut.
Q. MAY I please attempt a screenplay of 'Youth'. Or is someone already working on one? I want Leonardo Dicaprio :) (rockstar, honolulu)
A. Go ahead! Just don't ask me to read it.
Q. I was wondering if I could write the next twisp book for you. I don't want money, just something to do on the weekends for a while. I think I know the characters well enough. yeah, I could do that. besides, don't writers often write in the styles of other authors? hmmm...yes, could be a fine book. I have good ideas about Paris too... (John, Pistolville, NY)
A. Great, I'm glad someone does. Having you write the next book would be a great labor-saver for me. But then I'd have to sue you big time for copyright infringement.
Q. I am a twenty-seven year old guy from Long Beach, CA. Your book, "Youth In Revolt" should be read as part of a curriculum in most American Literature classes. It is amusing beyond words, so why are you writing you may ask. I would love to someday write too afraid mostly. How did you get your start? What drove you to move past any and all fear who had and urged you to press on? (David, Long Beach, CA)
A. I got my start writing short humor pieces. Years of rejections followed before I made a sale. What kept me going? Reading the (mostly) lousy stuff magazines were publishing. Hey, I can do better than that, I thought. After that trial by fire, one acquires a thick skin and a certain indifference to the what the critics say. I suggest you give it a shot.
Q. I have read the e-mail responses on this website that say you are nothing short of the second coming of Vonnegut. Well instead of following the herd I am going to lie to you and say that you SUCK. That any resemblance to your work and actual literature must be nothing short of coincidental. Having said that, If you ever find yourself in the western part of Missouri and in need of a meal look me up it would be my pleasure to treat you. (Ed, Independence Mo.)
A. Yet another confirmation that my readers are a peculiar lot. I'll be looking you up, Ed, when I raft down the Mississippi on my shantyboat.
Q. I have decided to go ahead and write the next book anyway. I figure that even if you sue me, I should be all set with the massive amounts of cash I will be making from all the press, not to mention the book sales. Or if worst comes to worst I will just sit blankly in front of my computer screen languidly typing "Nick Is God" over and over again. Yes...that should sell a million copies. (John, pistolville, Ill)
A. Well, you'll get a little finger exercise and maybe improve your typing. As a form of entertainment, it's probably no worse than watching your nose hair grow.
Q. I'm a late convert, but a committed one. In fact, after reading YIR over the past three days (to and from NYK from SF) I just ordered five copies for friends (so you might notice a leap on Amazon.com). Did I miss an explanation for the blindfold and gag over Trent's eyes and mouth when he finally scored with Apurva? And how did Vijay get out of jail (after the creep Lance traced the fingerprints from the breakin)? Your book is brilliant. I will now read your others. What are you working on? Are you still "over the bridge" from SF? (DS, Point Reyes, CA)
A. As you'll recall honorable Trent promised his parents that he would never "see or speak to" Apurva again. The blindfold and gag were sneaky Carlotta's way of getting around that vow. I'm not sure if Lance ever traced Vijay's fingerprints (since the cop already had a suspect for the break-in), and if he did, it's likely that Vijay just put the blame on Nick. (I'm getting hazy on some of the finer details now; it all made perfect sense back in 1993.) Currently, I'm working on some screenplay ideas. Yup, I'm still "over the bridge" in Sonoma County. And thanks for forking out actual dollars for my work!
Q. I am a big fan of your work and I have to say that Queen Of America is extremely well written and hilarious...the Nixon reference...oh god, damn good...the Canadian Bashing, endlessly entertaining...keep up the good work. for some rock and roll go to www.theechoes.com thank you for this publicity plug, I knew you would understand. (Ben, Irvine, CA)
A. Will blatant flattery get your website a free plug on C.D. Payne's query page? Apparently so.
Q. It's not really a question. I just wanted to thank you so much for writing Youth in Revolt. I'd always hated reading but for some reason I picked up that 500 page book and couldn't put it down. I can say that from that one book my eyes became open to the world of reading. Thank you so much. (Jon, Santa Barbara)
A. Thanks, Jon. Many readers have told me the same thing. Have a great time exploring books.
Q. How do you come up with stories that so many people can relate to? I started to read your book and it almost sounded exactly like mine--finding a beautiful girl--stuck with parents that have no clue--rebelling like hell--getting in trouble like hell--and then I gave it to one of my friends (which by the way is almost just like me with the same exact problems but in cleveland) and he couldn't put your book down either. I just want to know how do you do it? All I ask that you don't stop, please, you're my favorite writer. (Isaac, Lake Geneva, Wisconsin)
A. I just come up with the stories. Whether people can relate to them I leave to readers to decide. Say, your life does sound rather Twispian. Have your parents been institutionalized yet?
Q. Hi, I first read Youth In Revolt when I myself was 14, and somehow was able to get my hands on an original printing...the unabridged version. I've since read it again and was disappointed to find that there were a number of juicy tidbits which were cut by doubleday. I know that the original copies are rare, but I must own one, and will stop at nothing to obtain one. Do you have any suggestions as to where I might purchase one. I am by no means rich, but in this case, money is not an issue. I love that book. Thank you, (Joe, Seattle, WA)
A. I've noticed there are usually several listed at Half.com. Make sure you get the Aivia edition and not any of the Doubleday editions. The ISBN number is 1-882647-00-9. Abebooks.com is another place to check. Good luck!
Q. Hypothetically, if the world ends tomorrow, and it takes man 2000 years to modernize itself, and the only remaining artifacts left from our time are your books, what would they think? Though I love your books, I'd imagine they would be quite confused. (Duder, Richmond VA)
A. Maybe not. Put Nick in a toga and I'm sure he would have mixed quite well with the teens of Rome two millennia ago.
Q. How could you find out so many craziness? Did Nick Twisp jump out of your mind, or did you borrow him some character of your familiars? (Serlaci, Budapest)
A. It's not that Nick is so crazy, it's just that the rest of us are so sedate. Nope, he's not borrowed from anyone I know.
Q. Do you think that Nick's family instability in YIR affected his juvenile delinquency? How? And, how do you think that family instability in adolescence affects juvenile delinquency in real life? (Lauren, Los Angeles)
A. Why the Sociology 101 exam questions? Need I point out that these are comic novels? Besides, in my opinion Nick hardly qualifies as a juvenile delinquent. His musical tastes are much too refined.
Q. do you put your socks on before your boxers? (well, hence the prior do you wear boxers?) (Brian, San franfuckingcisco)
A. Regretfully, I must decline to answer all underwear-related questions. Nick, as you may know, does not wear boxers, though he occasionally dons the odd sock.
Q. I was wondering what your personal music/literature tastes run like. Do you also enjoy Reich and good 'ol F.S.? or are you more modern kinda guy. Personally, I believe Atlas Shrugged was a huge book, and plus I read the hardcover, so it was very heavy. Plus, it was boring. I would much prefer YIR any day. I also am a punk rock kinda guy. Can't say as I like F.S. very much. Except for the covers thereof. Have a nice day! :) (unabridged-boy, death valley)
A. To tell the truth, I rarely curl up with a weighty tome by Wilhelm Reich or Ayn Rand these days. Lately, I've been working my way through trailer park literature. I can recommend Trailer Park Hippies by Bill Coleman and Trailer Trash from Tennessee by David Hunter. I found White Trash in a Trailer Park by Randal Patrick slower going. Like Nick, I'm quite the fan of F.S., whose Awesome Intergalactic Greatness needs no defense here by me.
Typical hernia-sufferers who have not yet discovered the works of C.D. Payne.
Q. Of Nick's three alter egos in YIR, which do you like the best? Nick, Francois, or Carlotta? Which of those three do you like the best? Also, what was the role of Paul in this book? He seemed sort of Godlike. I absolutely love YIR and I finished it this morning. These were just some things I was wondering about. (Aliza, New York)
A. Please don't ask me to play favorites among my characters, though I appreciate Carlotta's theatricality. The role of Paul in the book was to be brotherly.
Q. Why does Nick act out so much? (Elle, Los Angeles)
A. If indeed Nick does so (that point is debatable), it is because Nick appears in comic novels and if he were a normal, average kid the books would be BORING, and no one would be writing me these questions.
Q. As you can tell from my name, I am a girl. I was wondering if you had many girl fans or if it is common for girls to like YIR. I was also wondering if boys were really as sex obsessed and horny and plain old desperate as you portray them in YIR. It is really sad when girls realize what boys are really all about. (Raquel, Worcester)
A. Don't feel bad, Nick has many female fans. Alas, it is true that Nick is a fairly accurate portrayal of the male teen libido. Fortunately, things calm down for most guys after age 35.
Q. First I am huge fan of yours, your books are amazing and you are greatly talented. I go to Ohio State and I write for the school newspaper, the second largest school newspaper in the country. I know you are from Akron, Ohio and I thought maybe a piece about you would be interesting. Did you live in Ohio for long? I know you went to Harvard but did you ever consider OSU? Well thanks for your time. (Ariel, Columbus, Ohio)
A. I lived in Ohio 18 years, which seemed long at the time, but then the days pass pretty slowly when you're a kid. In high school I went to Columbus occasionally for debate tournaments, and liked the city. But I wanted to experience a different part of the country for college. Though Columbus has a wholesome image, I should note for the record that I saw my first X-rated movie there ("I Am Curious Yellow) in the summer of 1969. I still root for the Buckeyes to beat Michigan.
Q. Hello...I just wanted to know what it's really like to go on a book tour or to lecture for a fee. Is it all that? I read a lot of Bukowski and, in his own way, he romanticized the whole process of being pestered by people that try to guess what you were really thinking when you wrote something. Say, I really like typing in this little box here. You should try it sometime. See you in the funny pages. I haven't read anything of yours recently, but I can say that your first book contributed to my divorce. I owe you immensely. Take care. (Xtopher, Mississippi)
A. I have gone on book tours (OK), but so far I have not had the pleasure of being paid a fee to talk. I imagine that makes the process so much more rewarding. Mostly it's the Europeans who doggedly root for the symbolism they assume lies buried in my convoluted tales. Must be the higher class of education they receive over there. And glad to be of service in the marital disruption dept.
Q. Just wanted to say that I read "Frisco Pigeon Mambo" the night after it arrived in my mailbox, and each chapter was like a suck on the Drag-o-Matic. I ended up staying up waaaay late and finishing it in one sitting. I love the way your characters so far (Nick Twisp and Robin) have this unshakable optimism about them, so integral to their characterization that it never occurs to them to give despair a moment's thought. Have you considered writing a "serious" novel, i.e., one which is not necessarily comedic in tone? I think that same irrepressible optimism, displayed by a character in a dramatic plot, would have an indelible impact. (John, Los Angeles, CA)
A. I doubt I have the sober temperament to write a "serious" novel. Too bad, 'cause I imagine not having to excavate for laughs lightens the task of novel writing.
Q. Dear Mr. Payne: You are my favorite writer ever! The only problem is, I can't find the sequel [revolting youth] in Canada anywhere!! This is a big problem as I know 6 others who really want to read it too! So if it is not too much trouble, could you send a copy of revolting youth to My address? My friends and I would really appreciate it a lot!! . . . Thank you for your time, and until nick decides that he is gay, I will religiously read your books!! (Shea, 100 Mile House, Canada)
A. Contrary to what you may imagine, writers in the U.S. are not supported by lavish grants from the government. They generally eke out a marginal living through the grubby expediency of peddling their books. What you might try is requesting that your local library purchase Revolting Youth. Libraries are surprisingly accommodating to their patrons' requests--a little known fact.
Q. What is your favorite type of cookie? (Erin, San Luis Obispo, California)
A. I was partial to my wife's cowboy cookies back in our pre-fat-conscious days.
Q. Are you prepared to have the media show up on your doorstep in case John Walker Lindh turns out to have been influenced by Nick Twisp? (katzkoltun, San Francisco)
A. Said novel is often seen beside the hot-tub in Marin County. I only hope John had a chance to discuss the book with his boss before the shooting started. A little light cave reading can do so much to relieve the tedium between bunker-busting bombs (both convention and nukular).
Q. I wondered if "youth in revolt" and "revolting youth" had ever been banned from anywhere? I loved them myself, but who knows what people will attempt to ban these days......(lita, hayward california/eugene oregon)
A. I am not aware of either being banned. Where are those zealous defenders of all that is decent!? If anyone has heard of any righteous Nick quashings, please let us know.
Q. I do not have 5,000 dollars [for a personal author appearance]. But I will say that you will be rewarded in heaven if you come and speak/sign at Kent State University. I used to attend Akron U--and noted that akron is your hometown. Give back to Ohio what once was theirs!!! (You)...(Angel, Kent, Ohio)
A. Maybe the next time I'm in Ohio I can schedule a reading at Kent State. Little known fact: I helped build the Kent State football stadium (summer job). Has it fallen down yet?
Q. I brought the book to school because I was reading it for a class project and the teacher asked to see it. When I showed her, she flipped through it, apparently opening to somewhere around page 99 or 100...which (at least in my printing) is the Nick & Lefty fellatio scene. Well, she wasn't impressed and took me and the book to the principals office. I was suspended for 4 days because I brought "pornographic" materials to school. Now, the school has banned the book. It sucks, because they took the book and I wasn't done yet. Now I have to buy ANOTHER copy. (Joey)
A. Now you know how the readers of James Joyce felt when their copies of Ulysses were confiscated by U.S. Customs. Another sacrifice for art!
Q. What exactly is going on with the production of Frisco Pigeon Mambo? I just wanted to add that I completely admire your work. (Kyle, Muncie, Indiana)
A. FPM is in its third year "in development" as an animated film. Hollywood does move at a glacial pace sometimes. Speaking of glaciers, readers can help by running out to see "Ice Age," which was produced by the same company that's slated to do FPM.
Q. I was reading the Q & A and someone said something about a Fox Pilot for YiR. Was there really a pilot, and if so, is there somewhere I could download it? (Jack, Seattle)
A. Yes, there really was a Fox pilot of YiR. I know because I was there for the taping. Alas, I don't know how you can get a copy of it. The producers were Brillstein-Grey, if that helps.
Q. I just read the comments by the guy who was dumped and almost went to jail on christmas...and you said that one should not follow Nick's example to far. But I think that is not true. Nick, besides having some minor setbacks along the way, is at this moment living the golden life. I would give my left-nut to trade places with him. I know that is a common expression, but I really mean it. My left nut! Besides, his life is fun and exciting. Plus he gets sex all the time...ah, the best life has yet to be seen by all of us. Nick is the man. (Twisp is the Man, Eaton, CT)
A. Me thinks thou art too hasty to part with thy left nut.
Q. MAY I please attempt a screenplay of 'Youth'. Or is someone already working on one? I want Leonardo Dicaprio :) (rockstar, honolulu)
A. Go ahead! Just don't ask me to read it.
Q. I was wondering if I could write the next twisp book for you. I don't want money, just something to do on the weekends for a while. I think I know the characters well enough. yeah, I could do that. besides, don't writers often write in the styles of other authors? hmmm...yes, could be a fine book. I have good ideas about Paris too... (John, Pistolville, NY)
A. Great, I'm glad someone does. Having you write the next book would be a great labor-saver for me. But then I'd have to sue you big time for copyright infringement.
Q. I am a twenty-seven year old guy from Long Beach, CA. Your book, "Youth In Revolt" should be read as part of a curriculum in most American Literature classes. It is amusing beyond words, so why are you writing you may ask. I would love to someday write too afraid mostly. How did you get your start? What drove you to move past any and all fear who had and urged you to press on? (David, Long Beach, CA)
A. I got my start writing short humor pieces. Years of rejections followed before I made a sale. What kept me going? Reading the (mostly) lousy stuff magazines were publishing. Hey, I can do better than that, I thought. After that trial by fire, one acquires a thick skin and a certain indifference to the what the critics say. I suggest you give it a shot.
Q. I have read the e-mail responses on this website that say you are nothing short of the second coming of Vonnegut. Well instead of following the herd I am going to lie to you and say that you SUCK. That any resemblance to your work and actual literature must be nothing short of coincidental. Having said that, If you ever find yourself in the western part of Missouri and in need of a meal look me up it would be my pleasure to treat you. (Ed, Independence Mo.)
A. Yet another confirmation that my readers are a peculiar lot. I'll be looking you up, Ed, when I raft down the Mississippi on my shantyboat.
Q. I have decided to go ahead and write the next book anyway. I figure that even if you sue me, I should be all set with the massive amounts of cash I will be making from all the press, not to mention the book sales. Or if worst comes to worst I will just sit blankly in front of my computer screen languidly typing "Nick Is God" over and over again. Yes...that should sell a million copies. (John, pistolville, Ill)
A. Well, you'll get a little finger exercise and maybe improve your typing. As a form of entertainment, it's probably no worse than watching your nose hair grow.
Q. I'm a late convert, but a committed one. In fact, after reading YIR over the past three days (to and from NYK from SF) I just ordered five copies for friends (so you might notice a leap on Amazon.com). Did I miss an explanation for the blindfold and gag over Trent's eyes and mouth when he finally scored with Apurva? And how did Vijay get out of jail (after the creep Lance traced the fingerprints from the breakin)? Your book is brilliant. I will now read your others. What are you working on? Are you still "over the bridge" from SF? (DS, Point Reyes, CA)
A. As you'll recall honorable Trent promised his parents that he would never "see or speak to" Apurva again. The blindfold and gag were sneaky Carlotta's way of getting around that vow. I'm not sure if Lance ever traced Vijay's fingerprints (since the cop already had a suspect for the break-in), and if he did, it's likely that Vijay just put the blame on Nick. (I'm getting hazy on some of the finer details now; it all made perfect sense back in 1993.) Currently, I'm working on some screenplay ideas. Yup, I'm still "over the bridge" in Sonoma County. And thanks for forking out actual dollars for my work!
Q. I am a big fan of your work and I have to say that Queen Of America is extremely well written and hilarious...the Nixon reference...oh god, damn good...the Canadian Bashing, endlessly entertaining...keep up the good work. for some rock and roll go to www.theechoes.com thank you for this publicity plug, I knew you would understand. (Ben, Irvine, CA)
A. Will blatant flattery get your website a free plug on C.D. Payne's query page? Apparently so.
Q. It's not really a question. I just wanted to thank you so much for writing Youth in Revolt. I'd always hated reading but for some reason I picked up that 500 page book and couldn't put it down. I can say that from that one book my eyes became open to the world of reading. Thank you so much. (Jon, Santa Barbara)
A. Thanks, Jon. Many readers have told me the same thing. Have a great time exploring books.
Q. How do you come up with stories that so many people can relate to? I started to read your book and it almost sounded exactly like mine--finding a beautiful girl--stuck with parents that have no clue--rebelling like hell--getting in trouble like hell--and then I gave it to one of my friends (which by the way is almost just like me with the same exact problems but in cleveland) and he couldn't put your book down either. I just want to know how do you do it? All I ask that you don't stop, please, you're my favorite writer. (Isaac, Lake Geneva, Wisconsin)
A. I just come up with the stories. Whether people can relate to them I leave to readers to decide. Say, your life does sound rather Twispian. Have your parents been institutionalized yet?
Q. Hi, I first read Youth In Revolt when I myself was 14, and somehow was able to get my hands on an original printing...the unabridged version. I've since read it again and was disappointed to find that there were a number of juicy tidbits which were cut by doubleday. I know that the original copies are rare, but I must own one, and will stop at nothing to obtain one. Do you have any suggestions as to where I might purchase one. I am by no means rich, but in this case, money is not an issue. I love that book. Thank you, (Joe, Seattle, WA)
A. I've noticed there are usually several listed at Half.com. Make sure you get the Aivia edition and not any of the Doubleday editions. The ISBN number is 1-882647-00-9. Abebooks.com is another place to check. Good luck!
Q. Hypothetically, if the world ends tomorrow, and it takes man 2000 years to modernize itself, and the only remaining artifacts left from our time are your books, what would they think? Though I love your books, I'd imagine they would be quite confused. (Duder, Richmond VA)
A. Maybe not. Put Nick in a toga and I'm sure he would have mixed quite well with the teens of Rome two millennia ago.
Q. How could you find out so many craziness? Did Nick Twisp jump out of your mind, or did you borrow him some character of your familiars? (Serlaci, Budapest)
A. It's not that Nick is so crazy, it's just that the rest of us are so sedate. Nope, he's not borrowed from anyone I know.
Q. Do you think that Nick's family instability in YIR affected his juvenile delinquency? How? And, how do you think that family instability in adolescence affects juvenile delinquency in real life? (Lauren, Los Angeles)
A. Why the Sociology 101 exam questions? Need I point out that these are comic novels? Besides, in my opinion Nick hardly qualifies as a juvenile delinquent. His musical tastes are much too refined.
Q. do you put your socks on before your boxers? (well, hence the prior do you wear boxers?) (Brian, San franfuckingcisco)
A. Regretfully, I must decline to answer all underwear-related questions. Nick, as you may know, does not wear boxers, though he occasionally dons the odd sock.
Q. I was wondering what your personal music/literature tastes run like. Do you also enjoy Reich and good 'ol F.S.? or are you more modern kinda guy. Personally, I believe Atlas Shrugged was a huge book, and plus I read the hardcover, so it was very heavy. Plus, it was boring. I would much prefer YIR any day. I also am a punk rock kinda guy. Can't say as I like F.S. very much. Except for the covers thereof. Have a nice day! :) (unabridged-boy, death valley)
A. To tell the truth, I rarely curl up with a weighty tome by Wilhelm Reich or Ayn Rand these days. Lately, I've been working my way through trailer park literature. I can recommend Trailer Park Hippies by Bill Coleman and Trailer Trash from Tennessee by David Hunter. I found White Trash in a Trailer Park by Randal Patrick slower going. Like Nick, I'm quite the fan of F.S., whose Awesome Intergalactic Greatness needs no defense here by me.
Typical hernia-sufferers who have not yet discovered the works of C.D. Payne.
Q. Of Nick's three alter egos in YIR, which do you like the best? Nick, Francois, or Carlotta? Which of those three do you like the best? Also, what was the role of Paul in this book? He seemed sort of Godlike. I absolutely love YIR and I finished it this morning. These were just some things I was wondering about. (Aliza, New York)
A. Please don't ask me to play favorites among my characters, though I appreciate Carlotta's theatricality. The role of Paul in the book was to be brotherly.
Q. Why does Nick act out so much? (Elle, Los Angeles)
A. If indeed Nick does so (that point is debatable), it is because Nick appears in comic novels and if he were a normal, average kid the books would be BORING, and no one would be writing me these questions.
Q. As you can tell from my name, I am a girl. I was wondering if you had many girl fans or if it is common for girls to like YIR. I was also wondering if boys were really as sex obsessed and horny and plain old desperate as you portray them in YIR. It is really sad when girls realize what boys are really all about. (Raquel, Worcester)
A. Don't feel bad, Nick has many female fans. Alas, it is true that Nick is a fairly accurate portrayal of the male teen libido. Fortunately, things calm down for most guys after age 35.
Q. First I am huge fan of yours, your books are amazing and you are greatly talented. I go to Ohio State and I write for the school newspaper, the second largest school newspaper in the country. I know you are from Akron, Ohio and I thought maybe a piece about you would be interesting. Did you live in Ohio for long? I know you went to Harvard but did you ever consider OSU? Well thanks for your time. (Ariel, Columbus, Ohio)
A. I lived in Ohio 18 years, which seemed long at the time, but then the days pass pretty slowly when you're a kid. In high school I went to Columbus occasionally for debate tournaments, and liked the city. But I wanted to experience a different part of the country for college. Though Columbus has a wholesome image, I should note for the record that I saw my first X-rated movie there ("I Am Curious Yellow) in the summer of 1969. I still root for the Buckeyes to beat Michigan.
Q. Hello...I just wanted to know what it's really like to go on a book tour or to lecture for a fee. Is it all that? I read a lot of Bukowski and, in his own way, he romanticized the whole process of being pestered by people that try to guess what you were really thinking when you wrote something. Say, I really like typing in this little box here. You should try it sometime. See you in the funny pages. I haven't read anything of yours recently, but I can say that your first book contributed to my divorce. I owe you immensely. Take care. (Xtopher, Mississippi)
A. I have gone on book tours (OK), but so far I have not had the pleasure of being paid a fee to talk. I imagine that makes the process so much more rewarding. Mostly it's the Europeans who doggedly root for the symbolism they assume lies buried in my convoluted tales. Must be the higher class of education they receive over there. And glad to be of service in the marital disruption dept.
Q. Just wanted to say that I read "Frisco Pigeon Mambo" the night after it arrived in my mailbox, and each chapter was like a suck on the Drag-o-Matic. I ended up staying up waaaay late and finishing it in one sitting. I love the way your characters so far (Nick Twisp and Robin) have this unshakable optimism about them, so integral to their characterization that it never occurs to them to give despair a moment's thought. Have you considered writing a "serious" novel, i.e., one which is not necessarily comedic in tone? I think that same irrepressible optimism, displayed by a character in a dramatic plot, would have an indelible impact. (John, Los Angeles, CA)
A. I doubt I have the sober temperament to write a "serious" novel. Too bad, 'cause I imagine not having to excavate for laughs lightens the task of novel writing.
Q. Dear Mr. Payne: You are my favorite writer ever! The only problem is, I can't find the sequel [revolting youth] in Canada anywhere!! This is a big problem as I know 6 others who really want to read it too! So if it is not too much trouble, could you send a copy of revolting youth to My address? My friends and I would really appreciate it a lot!! . . . Thank you for your time, and until nick decides that he is gay, I will religiously read your books!! (Shea, 100 Mile House, Canada)
A. Contrary to what you may imagine, writers in the U.S. are not supported by lavish grants from the government. They generally eke out a marginal living through the grubby expediency of peddling their books. What you might try is requesting that your local library purchase Revolting Youth. Libraries are surprisingly accommodating to their patrons' requests--a little known fact.
Q. What is your favorite type of cookie? (Erin, San Luis Obispo, California)
A. I was partial to my wife's cowboy cookies back in our pre-fat-conscious days.
Q. Are you prepared to have the media show up on your doorstep in case John Walker Lindh turns out to have been influenced by Nick Twisp? (katzkoltun, San Francisco)
A. Said novel is often seen beside the hot-tub in Marin County. I only hope John had a chance to discuss the book with his boss before the shooting started. A little light cave reading can do so much to relieve the tedium between bunker-busting bombs (both convention and nukular).
Q. I wondered if "youth in revolt" and "revolting youth" had ever been banned from anywhere? I loved them myself, but who knows what people will attempt to ban these days......(lita, hayward california/eugene oregon)
A. I am not aware of either being banned. Where are those zealous defenders of all that is decent!? If anyone has heard of any righteous Nick quashings, please let us know.
Q. I do not have 5,000 dollars [for a personal author appearance]. But I will say that you will be rewarded in heaven if you come and speak/sign at Kent State University. I used to attend Akron U--and noted that akron is your hometown. Give back to Ohio what once was theirs!!! (You)...(Angel, Kent, Ohio)
A. Maybe the next time I'm in Ohio I can schedule a reading at Kent State. Little known fact: I helped build the Kent State football stadium (summer job). Has it fallen down yet?
Q. I brought the book to school because I was reading it for a class project and the teacher asked to see it. When I showed her, she flipped through it, apparently opening to somewhere around page 99 or 100...which (at least in my printing) is the Nick & Lefty fellatio scene. Well, she wasn't impressed and took me and the book to the principals office. I was suspended for 4 days because I brought "pornographic" materials to school. Now, the school has banned the book. It sucks, because they took the book and I wasn't done yet. Now I have to buy ANOTHER copy. (Joey)
A. Now you know how the readers of James Joyce felt when their copies of Ulysses were confiscated by U.S. Customs. Another sacrifice for art!
Q. What exactly is going on with the production of Frisco Pigeon Mambo? I just wanted to add that I completely admire your work. (Kyle, Muncie, Indiana)
A. FPM is in its third year "in development" as an animated film. Hollywood does move at a glacial pace sometimes. Speaking of glaciers, readers can help by running out to see "Ice Age," which was produced by the same company that's slated to do FPM.
Q. Dear Modern Bard,
Your intellectual meanderings on the lives of teenagers and the moronic adults that torment them saved my life on the first reading and restored my faith in man on all subsequent indulgences. In a nutshell and with no exaggeration at all, you are a Zeus among mere mortals, a blessed sinner among blinded and filthy saints, an enchanted portal to sanity in a world gone mad. That said, RY did not find you at the top of your game. We all expect more from a master of your caliber in the ever anticipated continuation, but please, no matter what your level of genius on a given day, just start writing for christ's sake! And please, no more Doubleday or whatever corporate publisher drivel, whining about the money, or worries about film rights. Have you heard of independent films? How much does it cost to publish a book yourself? One million dollars? More? Can't you see the unusual and awesome effect you and your bemusings have on people, man?
We'll all chip in, I'll start the campaign if need be, and we'll publish them, the neverending sequels, intact for christ's sake, if you simply say the word. That goes for the movie too. Or do a subscription service type deal and send them out in email form for $20 each. Whatever. Most importantly, delay no further! Just put the pen to paper and start f'n writing. Do you not see that you have created a monster, Dr. Frankenstein? When you start a venture of such overwhelming power, a corresponding duty is effected, a price imposed as it were and now you must pay. Sorry. The beautiful and hungry seeds you have sown need sustenance.
Now get back to work. If you want us to leave you alone, simply excrete another RY in your sleep.
No matter what you do, more Nick or not, I thank you and will love you in an anonymous way forever. You helped me immensely and I'll never forget you for it. Long live Mr. Payne! (Staton, Burlingame, CA)
A. Thanks (I think) for the words of encouragement, though I wonder why you're so eager for another sequel if you didn't care for the first one. Sequels are tricky to write as they generally 1) roam over the same ground as the original, or 2) lurch off into areas that diehard fans find disquieting. They also tend to be unappealing to publishers. But then, I would like to find out what happens next to Nick.
Q. Hey C.D., You are so cool. I learned about your books from Chris Moore's website and what a treat. Nick a.k.a. Francois is the best. How did you think of putting such a verbose character in Oakland? I grew up here and make it up to Uriah once in awhile. Nick is a little bit Huck Finn mixed with ... I'm not sure. Take care and keep 'em coming. (Doogie, Oakland)
A. How fortunate you were to grow up in Oakland. I merely lived there for years. Anybody can reside in San Francisco (assuming you can afford the rent), but it takes a special sort of person to appreciate the low-key charms of Oakland.
Q. I MISS NICK! I finished YIR and now RY. Now Nick is gone...I feel that I can only reminisce with Nick in his past by reading the books again. But that doesn't hold the same fresh excitement. Do you recommend anything that I may enjoy nearly as much as a supplement for my fix of Nick? (LuLu, NYC)
A. Try Cold Comfort Farm by Stella Gibbons or The Full Catastrophe by David Carkeet. A Confederacy of Dunces is always good for an annual re-read. The Diary of Adrian Mole and its sequels by Sue Townsend make a good compare-and-contrast with Nick project. Don't miss Edwin Mullhouse by Steven Millhauser. The Mapp and Lucia series of comic novels by E.F. Benson are also essential reading. How about some suggestions from Nick fans?
Q. After bumping into Y.I.R. as an employee selection at Barnes and Noble, I have not been able to put it down. (Haven't gotten to the Pigeons yet, but they're next.) I have a suggestion for you. What about George Twisp's novel, (still stuck on page 12)? Whatever happened to his halted masterpiece? Anyway, I think it would make for interesting reading...hell I'd buy it. Thanks a lot from the armpit of America! (Stephanie, West Orange, NJ)
A. I fear I may not have what it takes to create a novel ostensibly from the pen of the incomparable George Twisp. The guy is a master prose stylist. I hear East Orange is quite nice though.
Q. I am, at the present time, doing my very own series of chicken stories and was excited to see that you are also interested in the very same thing or so it would seem. Have you any background in chicken psychology? It appears that you do know the inner workings of the fowls' mind and can really put the reader in the picture. Your description of the bird that had escaped from the chicken napper was a tour deforce of how a bird might react to the shock of knowing that it had escaped one fate only to be caught up in the trauma of another life threatening event and to do so in such a bird like style. (Jake, Florida)
A. Thanks for the praise, but to my knowledge I have never written about chickens in my life. Now pigeons are another story. . . By the way, I hope everyone saw the Times story about the pigeons that ride the subway trains in New York. Those birds are way brighter than most of us realize.
Q. I am starting a band, what name do you think would be good, and are you all right with my making obscure literary references to your books?
1. camu the wonderdog
2. walking albert
3. albert must die
I loved the sequel, what music do you listen to? (sean, phoenix)
A. I'd vote for #1, although according to Dwayne the correct spelling is Kamu. That name might be a trifle long. I don't mind obscure references to Nick in the names of rock bands. Lately, I've been listening to fellow Ohioian David Wilson (plays violin). You probably wouldn't like him.
Q. Are there any parallels with the adolescence of Nick Twisp that mirror any incidents of your own as a youth? Which characteristics of Nick's are most like your own? Thanks!
(Angie, Long Beach)
A. Believe it or not, I liked Frank Sinatra as a teenager. Yeah, that was strange even back then. Other than that, I can't think of any personal similarities with that notorious rebellious youth. For example, unlike Nick, I had no aspirations as a teen of becoming a writer. Oddly enough, I still don't.
Q. I once got solicitations from Scott Meredith in the mail. I had many solicitations over several years that used an example of how Scott got things done that reprinted a book column from the Chicago Tribune, or Sun, by a Mr Cromie, a book columnist. It mentioned a big Scott Meredith find of an author who had written a book called "Where's the Action?" (I think the author's last name was Douglas) Is any of this ringing a bell yet? (John, minneapolis)
A. No, sorry. Meredith was the agent I paid to read the manuscript of Youth in Revolt. He took the $$$ and told me the book was unsaleable. He was the agent for Norman Mailer, P.G. Wodehouse, and other big names at the time. He is now deceased, but his agency lives on and is still dinging budding authors to read their stuff. Do they ever reveal the ratio of authors accepted as clients to the number of manuscripts read? I doubt it!
Q. First of all I don't know how you did it, but thank you so much for writing these books. This is now become my favorite book. When I first finished Youth in Revolt. I wanted more the very second I put it down I asked my teacher was their more: "gotta have more". We looked it up on the internet and found the sequel and I said to him, "I don't care how you do it but get that sequel and fast". My teacher and I are dumbfounded by your work and I know I can't ask will there be another one, so I'll ask something else instead. In writing these "journals" did you have any idea how happy you would make the people reading it feel? I doff my hat in honor of you and say bravo. P.S. Can you get me a date with Sheeni? (hahahaha just kidding), but no really?
P.P.S. you made me so happy when Nick's mother shot Lance in the cahona's. thank you. (james, altavista)
A. In writing humorous novels one generally tries to be amusing. Seems like a laudable goal, though one must be prepared for a certain amount of public indifference and critical vilification. A date with Sheeni would be difficult to arrange as you may recall that she is presently married (and to a guy you wouldn't want to cross).
Q. yeah, I, as im sure many people have noticed, that many of the not so influential characters in "youth in revolt" had very outlandish names, such as the both reverends, I was just wondering if those were just made up on a whim, or they were possibly an inside joke of yours, thanks. (campise, bakersfield, ca)
A. There is a school of humor writing that favors outlandish character names. Readers these days, though, don't have much tolerance for such antics. The names of the two reverends were made up from reverential sounding syllables combined in sufficiently improbable ways to avoid the possibility of being sued by actual men of the cloth with similar names.
Q. Will you write another book about true-to-life characters? Frisco Pigeon Mambo was pretty farfetched. You are Americas' second best publishing author, after Steve King. Sorry, but the dark tower kicks your ass. Doesn't matter though, your book changed my life. If you wrote more books, I might be more charitable. keep up the good work. (jeremey, naples fl)
A. Don't worry. No more animal books from me. Even laid low by an errant van driver Mr. King still out-produces the likes of me. But then, how many laughs do you get from his books? Nope, I'll never be a prolific writer. Too many irons in the fire (and projects in the shop).
Q. please could you tell me:
#How paul knows everything about nick? I think that this is an excellent asset to the story, though I’m not sure how he is so knowledgeable of nick's actions.
#Why the dog (albert) is not there when they try to dig him up on halloween?
#Who placed the neon sign in the ground replacing albert. Thank you for taking the time to read my questions and I look toward to hearing from you soon. (Lee Ralph, bristol, england)
A. Some things (like God, for instance) you have to take on faith. The same is true for Paul's omniscience and Albert's paranormal peculiarities. Hope this helps. Are you guys still doing the Stomp over there?
Q. Hello again, still a big fan. Just wondering does Nick know that if he was to have lain' low for two years that he couldn't be arrested for anything? According to federal law if you haven't been caught or tried for something in two years time, you get off scott free. But I think I like the ending of him going to paris better great job. (james, altavista, ca)
A. Years may have gone by for you and me, but so far only nine months have passed for Nick. Thus, he is still a fugitive. Life is tough for fictional characters.
Q. What is the story, if any, behind Nick's (and presumably your) kinship with Jean Paul Belmondo? As a lad, and to this day (49 years later) I have been a huge Jean Paul fan ...with a Gitane dangling from my lip throughout high school, etc. I was hooked on the Twisp series before Belmondo was mentioned, now I'm a hopeless Twisp groupie. PS: I'll pay your expenses for a trip to Santa Barbara for a signing, reading or just a fun lunch. (Scott, Santa Barbara, CA)
A. Since Francophile Sheeni is attracted to dangerous men, her fixation on Mr. Belmondo is easy to understand. So Nick must emulate her hero to measure up to her standards--with loud explosions along the way. Sounds like you aspired to dangerousness at well. Me, I was too bookish to bring it off. Thanks for the invite to Santa Barbara--a good place I'm told for Oprah spotting.
Q. I picked up "Youth In Revolt" last week at a local bookstore. I hadn't heard anything about it but I thought I'd give it a shot. I was completely blown away! It's now one of the new favs and I will definitely recommend it to everyone I know. Thanks for a fantastic book. BTW, this was the only book of all your titles on the bookshelf (and this is a major chain in Canada)! I'd love to read your other work if I could get my hands on it! (SD, Toronto, Canada)
A. You're lucky. Many major chain bookstores don't stock any of my books. Persistence is required to find my later books in Canada, a nation that may not know what it's missing.
Q. I'm a poor and unprivileged teen who's been diagnosed with a rare disease passed down from my crack head mother and my last request before I die is to watch the pilot of youth in revolt... well I'm not really poor or unprivileged and I don't have a crack head mother who gave me a rare disease, but I am a teenager who read your book and loved it. You actually made reading enjoyable for teens everywhere! So what's up with that pilot? (Cassie, Vallejo, CA)
A. The people you need to bug are at Brillstein-Grey in Los Angeles. Maybe they could add to their corporate bottom line by peddling videos of the pilot to Nickophiles. I saw it and it's pretty funny. You will recognize several actors from "Malcolm in the Middle," should you succeed in scoring a copy from them.
Q. Just as an aside, your novels, and coincidentally your humor, rival anything on the shelves of bookstores today. I have greatly enjoyed every book you've written and thank my friend (from Oakland, CA) every day for turning me on to your prose. Just a quick question.....do you speak French fluently? And what influences you to use the French language in your books? I have always wondered, since the French theme and language make a good number of Cameo appearances in your work. Thanks for responding (if you do respond), I'll greatly appreciate it! (Kimmie, Clearwater, FL)
A. I speak French not at all--a handicap at trendier restaurants. Since the French are inherently funny folks, they and their wacky language feature prominently in many comic novels.
Q. Yes, this has probably been asked, but how about a genuine "I'm Single, Let's Mingle" shirt in the merchandise section? Also, beyond Sinatra, are there any other musical artists who have influenced you (or more specifically, aided to the creation of YiR)? (I yam eh fan, Somewhere in Colorado)
A. Look for more exciting merchandise soon, so start saving up that pocket change! [See new cargo on home page.] Can't say if musicians have directly influenced my writing, but Duke Ellington and Ella Fitzgerald certainly have enriched my soul.
Q. Sometimes I am dreaming about movie Youth in Revolt, but is there any chance to make this movie? Just try to imagine that there would be this opportunity, who could be the principal of Nick Twisp and the others characters? (Alohim, Czech Republic)
A. Am I dreaming or have we had this question before? At its current pace of progress, "Youth in Revolt" the movie should be entertaining your grandchildren in the year 2063. Therefore, the actor who will play Nick has not yet been born--alas, rendering such speculation pointless.
Q. Being a 14 year old myself, your Nick Twisp novels have given me the opportunity to relate to as a teenager. I'm glad someone has finally come along to put down what I'm going through, and what I'm thinking, in words. My dilemma is that after reading Youth in Revolt, and Revolting Youth, no other book I read even compares... So, if you would, please tell me what would be a similar book for me to read that I'd enjoy just as much as your Youth in Revolt and Revolting Youth (considering I've been checking amazon.com every week for the past year to see if you've published a third book!) and if it would trouble you that much, please... make that a pretty please... tell me if I should even bother to get my hopes up about another book. And I understand if you're sick of this last question, but you have no clue how depressed I was after finishing Revolting Youth to find there was no sequel. So if you don't feel like answering, please just respond to my first question, which was, are there any other books you recommend that are similar to Youth In Revolt that I would enjoy. Thank you for your time, (Zack, New York)
A. I may be biased here, but I can't think of any other books that quite compare with Nick's. I've recommended some comic novels above that I've enjoyed over the years, but personal tastes vary and I can't guarantee you'll go for them. If you read widely, over the years you're sure to discover more books that you treasure.
Q. Hey there, I am a big fan and am reading YIR for the third time, but there is a question I have always wanted to ask an author, especially one like yourself who has a "cult" following. I recommend YIR to anyone who asks, and inevitably they always end up with my copy. How do you feel about this? Though your work is being read, you aren't getting any cash. Just curious.
(Duder, Culpeper VA)
A. The net effect of having more readers than book sales: mainstream publishers are not interested in publishing my books and the author has to find other ways of making a living (he groused bitterly).
Q. hi there! I just learned about you and your book yesterday. and you know what's weird? I’ve seen your book from a bestfriend who bought your book from a booksale! and to add to that, philippine is like one of the remotest place on earth!!! hahaha and the only thing I can say about your book... its pretty ADDICTIVE! (christina, philippines)
A. Always nice to hear Nick is spreading to new places. Did he arrive via dugout canoe or in the flight bag of a swinging jetsetter?
MORE . . .
Your intellectual meanderings on the lives of teenagers and the moronic adults that torment them saved my life on the first reading and restored my faith in man on all subsequent indulgences. In a nutshell and with no exaggeration at all, you are a Zeus among mere mortals, a blessed sinner among blinded and filthy saints, an enchanted portal to sanity in a world gone mad. That said, RY did not find you at the top of your game. We all expect more from a master of your caliber in the ever anticipated continuation, but please, no matter what your level of genius on a given day, just start writing for christ's sake! And please, no more Doubleday or whatever corporate publisher drivel, whining about the money, or worries about film rights. Have you heard of independent films? How much does it cost to publish a book yourself? One million dollars? More? Can't you see the unusual and awesome effect you and your bemusings have on people, man?
We'll all chip in, I'll start the campaign if need be, and we'll publish them, the neverending sequels, intact for christ's sake, if you simply say the word. That goes for the movie too. Or do a subscription service type deal and send them out in email form for $20 each. Whatever. Most importantly, delay no further! Just put the pen to paper and start f'n writing. Do you not see that you have created a monster, Dr. Frankenstein? When you start a venture of such overwhelming power, a corresponding duty is effected, a price imposed as it were and now you must pay. Sorry. The beautiful and hungry seeds you have sown need sustenance.
Now get back to work. If you want us to leave you alone, simply excrete another RY in your sleep.
No matter what you do, more Nick or not, I thank you and will love you in an anonymous way forever. You helped me immensely and I'll never forget you for it. Long live Mr. Payne! (Staton, Burlingame, CA)
A. Thanks (I think) for the words of encouragement, though I wonder why you're so eager for another sequel if you didn't care for the first one. Sequels are tricky to write as they generally 1) roam over the same ground as the original, or 2) lurch off into areas that diehard fans find disquieting. They also tend to be unappealing to publishers. But then, I would like to find out what happens next to Nick.
Q. Hey C.D., You are so cool. I learned about your books from Chris Moore's website and what a treat. Nick a.k.a. Francois is the best. How did you think of putting such a verbose character in Oakland? I grew up here and make it up to Uriah once in awhile. Nick is a little bit Huck Finn mixed with ... I'm not sure. Take care and keep 'em coming. (Doogie, Oakland)
A. How fortunate you were to grow up in Oakland. I merely lived there for years. Anybody can reside in San Francisco (assuming you can afford the rent), but it takes a special sort of person to appreciate the low-key charms of Oakland.
Q. I MISS NICK! I finished YIR and now RY. Now Nick is gone...I feel that I can only reminisce with Nick in his past by reading the books again. But that doesn't hold the same fresh excitement. Do you recommend anything that I may enjoy nearly as much as a supplement for my fix of Nick? (LuLu, NYC)
A. Try Cold Comfort Farm by Stella Gibbons or The Full Catastrophe by David Carkeet. A Confederacy of Dunces is always good for an annual re-read. The Diary of Adrian Mole and its sequels by Sue Townsend make a good compare-and-contrast with Nick project. Don't miss Edwin Mullhouse by Steven Millhauser. The Mapp and Lucia series of comic novels by E.F. Benson are also essential reading. How about some suggestions from Nick fans?
Q. After bumping into Y.I.R. as an employee selection at Barnes and Noble, I have not been able to put it down. (Haven't gotten to the Pigeons yet, but they're next.) I have a suggestion for you. What about George Twisp's novel, (still stuck on page 12)? Whatever happened to his halted masterpiece? Anyway, I think it would make for interesting reading...hell I'd buy it. Thanks a lot from the armpit of America! (Stephanie, West Orange, NJ)
A. I fear I may not have what it takes to create a novel ostensibly from the pen of the incomparable George Twisp. The guy is a master prose stylist. I hear East Orange is quite nice though.
Q. I am, at the present time, doing my very own series of chicken stories and was excited to see that you are also interested in the very same thing or so it would seem. Have you any background in chicken psychology? It appears that you do know the inner workings of the fowls' mind and can really put the reader in the picture. Your description of the bird that had escaped from the chicken napper was a tour deforce of how a bird might react to the shock of knowing that it had escaped one fate only to be caught up in the trauma of another life threatening event and to do so in such a bird like style. (Jake, Florida)
A. Thanks for the praise, but to my knowledge I have never written about chickens in my life. Now pigeons are another story. . . By the way, I hope everyone saw the Times story about the pigeons that ride the subway trains in New York. Those birds are way brighter than most of us realize.
Q. I am starting a band, what name do you think would be good, and are you all right with my making obscure literary references to your books?
1. camu the wonderdog
2. walking albert
3. albert must die
I loved the sequel, what music do you listen to? (sean, phoenix)
A. I'd vote for #1, although according to Dwayne the correct spelling is Kamu. That name might be a trifle long. I don't mind obscure references to Nick in the names of rock bands. Lately, I've been listening to fellow Ohioian David Wilson (plays violin). You probably wouldn't like him.
Q. Are there any parallels with the adolescence of Nick Twisp that mirror any incidents of your own as a youth? Which characteristics of Nick's are most like your own? Thanks!
(Angie, Long Beach)
A. Believe it or not, I liked Frank Sinatra as a teenager. Yeah, that was strange even back then. Other than that, I can't think of any personal similarities with that notorious rebellious youth. For example, unlike Nick, I had no aspirations as a teen of becoming a writer. Oddly enough, I still don't.
Q. I once got solicitations from Scott Meredith in the mail. I had many solicitations over several years that used an example of how Scott got things done that reprinted a book column from the Chicago Tribune, or Sun, by a Mr Cromie, a book columnist. It mentioned a big Scott Meredith find of an author who had written a book called "Where's the Action?" (I think the author's last name was Douglas) Is any of this ringing a bell yet? (John, minneapolis)
A. No, sorry. Meredith was the agent I paid to read the manuscript of Youth in Revolt. He took the $$$ and told me the book was unsaleable. He was the agent for Norman Mailer, P.G. Wodehouse, and other big names at the time. He is now deceased, but his agency lives on and is still dinging budding authors to read their stuff. Do they ever reveal the ratio of authors accepted as clients to the number of manuscripts read? I doubt it!
Q. First of all I don't know how you did it, but thank you so much for writing these books. This is now become my favorite book. When I first finished Youth in Revolt. I wanted more the very second I put it down I asked my teacher was their more: "gotta have more". We looked it up on the internet and found the sequel and I said to him, "I don't care how you do it but get that sequel and fast". My teacher and I are dumbfounded by your work and I know I can't ask will there be another one, so I'll ask something else instead. In writing these "journals" did you have any idea how happy you would make the people reading it feel? I doff my hat in honor of you and say bravo. P.S. Can you get me a date with Sheeni? (hahahaha just kidding), but no really?
P.P.S. you made me so happy when Nick's mother shot Lance in the cahona's. thank you. (james, altavista)
A. In writing humorous novels one generally tries to be amusing. Seems like a laudable goal, though one must be prepared for a certain amount of public indifference and critical vilification. A date with Sheeni would be difficult to arrange as you may recall that she is presently married (and to a guy you wouldn't want to cross).
Q. yeah, I, as im sure many people have noticed, that many of the not so influential characters in "youth in revolt" had very outlandish names, such as the both reverends, I was just wondering if those were just made up on a whim, or they were possibly an inside joke of yours, thanks. (campise, bakersfield, ca)
A. There is a school of humor writing that favors outlandish character names. Readers these days, though, don't have much tolerance for such antics. The names of the two reverends were made up from reverential sounding syllables combined in sufficiently improbable ways to avoid the possibility of being sued by actual men of the cloth with similar names.
Q. Will you write another book about true-to-life characters? Frisco Pigeon Mambo was pretty farfetched. You are Americas' second best publishing author, after Steve King. Sorry, but the dark tower kicks your ass. Doesn't matter though, your book changed my life. If you wrote more books, I might be more charitable. keep up the good work. (jeremey, naples fl)
A. Don't worry. No more animal books from me. Even laid low by an errant van driver Mr. King still out-produces the likes of me. But then, how many laughs do you get from his books? Nope, I'll never be a prolific writer. Too many irons in the fire (and projects in the shop).
Q. please could you tell me:
#How paul knows everything about nick? I think that this is an excellent asset to the story, though I’m not sure how he is so knowledgeable of nick's actions.
#Why the dog (albert) is not there when they try to dig him up on halloween?
#Who placed the neon sign in the ground replacing albert. Thank you for taking the time to read my questions and I look toward to hearing from you soon. (Lee Ralph, bristol, england)
A. Some things (like God, for instance) you have to take on faith. The same is true for Paul's omniscience and Albert's paranormal peculiarities. Hope this helps. Are you guys still doing the Stomp over there?
Q. Hello again, still a big fan. Just wondering does Nick know that if he was to have lain' low for two years that he couldn't be arrested for anything? According to federal law if you haven't been caught or tried for something in two years time, you get off scott free. But I think I like the ending of him going to paris better great job. (james, altavista, ca)
A. Years may have gone by for you and me, but so far only nine months have passed for Nick. Thus, he is still a fugitive. Life is tough for fictional characters.
Q. What is the story, if any, behind Nick's (and presumably your) kinship with Jean Paul Belmondo? As a lad, and to this day (49 years later) I have been a huge Jean Paul fan ...with a Gitane dangling from my lip throughout high school, etc. I was hooked on the Twisp series before Belmondo was mentioned, now I'm a hopeless Twisp groupie. PS: I'll pay your expenses for a trip to Santa Barbara for a signing, reading or just a fun lunch. (Scott, Santa Barbara, CA)
A. Since Francophile Sheeni is attracted to dangerous men, her fixation on Mr. Belmondo is easy to understand. So Nick must emulate her hero to measure up to her standards--with loud explosions along the way. Sounds like you aspired to dangerousness at well. Me, I was too bookish to bring it off. Thanks for the invite to Santa Barbara--a good place I'm told for Oprah spotting.
Q. I picked up "Youth In Revolt" last week at a local bookstore. I hadn't heard anything about it but I thought I'd give it a shot. I was completely blown away! It's now one of the new favs and I will definitely recommend it to everyone I know. Thanks for a fantastic book. BTW, this was the only book of all your titles on the bookshelf (and this is a major chain in Canada)! I'd love to read your other work if I could get my hands on it! (SD, Toronto, Canada)
A. You're lucky. Many major chain bookstores don't stock any of my books. Persistence is required to find my later books in Canada, a nation that may not know what it's missing.
Q. I'm a poor and unprivileged teen who's been diagnosed with a rare disease passed down from my crack head mother and my last request before I die is to watch the pilot of youth in revolt... well I'm not really poor or unprivileged and I don't have a crack head mother who gave me a rare disease, but I am a teenager who read your book and loved it. You actually made reading enjoyable for teens everywhere! So what's up with that pilot? (Cassie, Vallejo, CA)
A. The people you need to bug are at Brillstein-Grey in Los Angeles. Maybe they could add to their corporate bottom line by peddling videos of the pilot to Nickophiles. I saw it and it's pretty funny. You will recognize several actors from "Malcolm in the Middle," should you succeed in scoring a copy from them.
Q. Just as an aside, your novels, and coincidentally your humor, rival anything on the shelves of bookstores today. I have greatly enjoyed every book you've written and thank my friend (from Oakland, CA) every day for turning me on to your prose. Just a quick question.....do you speak French fluently? And what influences you to use the French language in your books? I have always wondered, since the French theme and language make a good number of Cameo appearances in your work. Thanks for responding (if you do respond), I'll greatly appreciate it! (Kimmie, Clearwater, FL)
A. I speak French not at all--a handicap at trendier restaurants. Since the French are inherently funny folks, they and their wacky language feature prominently in many comic novels.
Q. Yes, this has probably been asked, but how about a genuine "I'm Single, Let's Mingle" shirt in the merchandise section? Also, beyond Sinatra, are there any other musical artists who have influenced you (or more specifically, aided to the creation of YiR)? (I yam eh fan, Somewhere in Colorado)
A. Look for more exciting merchandise soon, so start saving up that pocket change! [See new cargo on home page.] Can't say if musicians have directly influenced my writing, but Duke Ellington and Ella Fitzgerald certainly have enriched my soul.
Q. Sometimes I am dreaming about movie Youth in Revolt, but is there any chance to make this movie? Just try to imagine that there would be this opportunity, who could be the principal of Nick Twisp and the others characters? (Alohim, Czech Republic)
A. Am I dreaming or have we had this question before? At its current pace of progress, "Youth in Revolt" the movie should be entertaining your grandchildren in the year 2063. Therefore, the actor who will play Nick has not yet been born--alas, rendering such speculation pointless.
Q. Being a 14 year old myself, your Nick Twisp novels have given me the opportunity to relate to as a teenager. I'm glad someone has finally come along to put down what I'm going through, and what I'm thinking, in words. My dilemma is that after reading Youth in Revolt, and Revolting Youth, no other book I read even compares... So, if you would, please tell me what would be a similar book for me to read that I'd enjoy just as much as your Youth in Revolt and Revolting Youth (considering I've been checking amazon.com every week for the past year to see if you've published a third book!) and if it would trouble you that much, please... make that a pretty please... tell me if I should even bother to get my hopes up about another book. And I understand if you're sick of this last question, but you have no clue how depressed I was after finishing Revolting Youth to find there was no sequel. So if you don't feel like answering, please just respond to my first question, which was, are there any other books you recommend that are similar to Youth In Revolt that I would enjoy. Thank you for your time, (Zack, New York)
A. I may be biased here, but I can't think of any other books that quite compare with Nick's. I've recommended some comic novels above that I've enjoyed over the years, but personal tastes vary and I can't guarantee you'll go for them. If you read widely, over the years you're sure to discover more books that you treasure.
Q. Hey there, I am a big fan and am reading YIR for the third time, but there is a question I have always wanted to ask an author, especially one like yourself who has a "cult" following. I recommend YIR to anyone who asks, and inevitably they always end up with my copy. How do you feel about this? Though your work is being read, you aren't getting any cash. Just curious.
(Duder, Culpeper VA)
A. The net effect of having more readers than book sales: mainstream publishers are not interested in publishing my books and the author has to find other ways of making a living (he groused bitterly).
Q. hi there! I just learned about you and your book yesterday. and you know what's weird? I’ve seen your book from a bestfriend who bought your book from a booksale! and to add to that, philippine is like one of the remotest place on earth!!! hahaha and the only thing I can say about your book... its pretty ADDICTIVE! (christina, philippines)
A. Always nice to hear Nick is spreading to new places. Did he arrive via dugout canoe or in the flight bag of a swinging jetsetter?
MORE . . .